AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
This is what I thought in my head this morning as I woke up realizing that today I have to do ALL the cleaning by Thursday. Tomorrow I'm driving Nick to work, completing some shopping, picking up Nick, picking up Mom, and starting the cooking for Thursday, so there will be no time tomorrow...
Upstairs, downstairs, toilets, laundry, dishes...no time for Just Dance today...
Hold it...
What? There's NO time!
There will be time this evening.
But I'll be SO tired!
Really? I feel like we have this conversation all the time.
We do.
OK, then. What am I about to say?
Fat doesn't care that you're "too busy" to work out. But...what about Bear's bedtime?
She does just fine waiting up for you. She was even super happy last night while you cuddled as a family on the couch watching Scare Tactics and Urban Legends on SyFy...I still can't believe they renamed it that...arg.
OK...OK...you win. I'll work out after all the cleaning is done.
In my case, all work and no play makes Katie a large lady. Having this big house is a big blessing in a lot of ways, but it really sucks being the only family out here right now. I miss my family, I'm out in the middle of nowhere all alone most of the day (sometimes quite late in the day if Nick is consulting), and I clean...a lot. When I don't clean, it sucks even worse because the work piles up and then I have more to do than if it was maintained. Since I was so sick last week, I didn't clean and now we have 17 people coming out here to our home on Thursday and the place isn't anywhere near ready.
My little bugaboo is certainly a good help, though. No, she doesn't do the dishes or fold the clothes or pick up her toys, but she is so independent and happy, she makes my cleaning work a little easier.
OK...you're stalling now.
Yeah, I know.
Get to it!
OK! OK! Pushy much?
*grins a bossy grin*
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Monday, November 21, 2011
Weigh-In 11/21/11
I stood staring at the scale.
I can't do it...I don't want to know. Yesterday was horrible.
You HAVE to do it. Today is Weigh-In Day.
Can't I do it tomorrow after I've had a chance to fix what I did?
No.
"Ugh." I stepped on the scale and watched the zeros cross the display from left to right a couple times...I felt like I was on The Biggest Loser, waiting on the number. It felt so long, even though they only crossed the screen twice. 192. *sigh* A 3.2 lb gain.
Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! After all that talk about Fat not taking a sick day and pushing through and all that jazz, I blew it! Kyoto AND McDonald's?!?! Are you kidding me?
OK...so you had a gain. This happens. If it were easy, it wouldn't be a "journey," it would be a one-way path with no turns or curves.
Oh shut up! *punches will-power* OW!
I learned my lesson last time...like my new helmet?
Ugh...
I'm just SO angry with myself. I've been so sick and I pushed myself SO hard to work out and watch what I ate up until the bad news at the dentist's office. I mean...really?!?!? Did I really think this would NOT be the results? No. But one can hope to maintain despite bad eating...lol. I was going to take a break today from moving about, but this just solidifies that Fat doesn't take a break. The hibachi food and Double Quarter Pounder are sitting on my abs...I can feel it...and they need to go away. I will dance them away and be back down under the 190's next Monday despite Thanksgiving! Mark my frakking words!
Comicon 2013Starting Weight: 194
Current Weight: 192
Comicon 2013 Goal Weight: 160
Pounds to Lose: 32
Pounds Per Week: 3.2 (yikes!)
I can't do it...I don't want to know. Yesterday was horrible.
You HAVE to do it. Today is Weigh-In Day.
Can't I do it tomorrow after I've had a chance to fix what I did?
No.
"Ugh." I stepped on the scale and watched the zeros cross the display from left to right a couple times...I felt like I was on The Biggest Loser, waiting on the number. It felt so long, even though they only crossed the screen twice. 192. *sigh* A 3.2 lb gain.
Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! After all that talk about Fat not taking a sick day and pushing through and all that jazz, I blew it! Kyoto AND McDonald's?!?! Are you kidding me?
OK...so you had a gain. This happens. If it were easy, it wouldn't be a "journey," it would be a one-way path with no turns or curves.
Oh shut up! *punches will-power* OW!
I learned my lesson last time...like my new helmet?
Ugh...
I'm just SO angry with myself. I've been so sick and I pushed myself SO hard to work out and watch what I ate up until the bad news at the dentist's office. I mean...really?!?!? Did I really think this would NOT be the results? No. But one can hope to maintain despite bad eating...lol. I was going to take a break today from moving about, but this just solidifies that Fat doesn't take a break. The hibachi food and Double Quarter Pounder are sitting on my abs...I can feel it...and they need to go away. I will dance them away and be back down under the 190's next Monday despite Thanksgiving! Mark my frakking words!
Comicon 2013Starting Weight: 194
Current Weight: 192
Comicon 2013 Goal Weight: 160
Pounds to Lose: 32
Pounds Per Week: 3.2 (yikes!)
Friday, November 18, 2011
No One Ever Listens to Katie...Even Katie
I knew it was going to be bad. The past few times at the dentist, they've told me about issues that I just couldn't afford to fix and now the poo was going to hit the fan...I just knew it...and I was right.
Let me just say that despite the horrible news I received, this was the BEST experience at the dentist I've ever had. The people at Monroe Family Dentistry are amazing, kind, and professional and had a way of presenting the difficult news that didn't turn me into a crying mess. haha.
Standing at the counter after my appointment with Nick and Bear, we heard all the work that needed to be done and the money it was going to cost us. I know all Nick was hearing was "ka ching ka ching ka ching..." "Just do it all," he says
"ALL of it?" I reply.
"Yes. Let's just get all the issues taken care of once and for all."
"Ok...Let's schedule it."
"This will mean no Comicon 2012 because of the cost, but it doesn't rule out Comicon 2013. If you hit the goal we set by the end of January, we'll go in 2013."
My heart sank to my stomach. No Comicon 2012!?! But...But...Doctor Who is celebrating its 50th year next year! I'm sure it's going to me more marvelous than EVER! Extreme disappointment settled in me.
I scheduled all the work to be done in February 2012 (yay...going to be in SO much pain that month). A root canal, 4 cavity fillings, and 3 wisdom tooth removals. Ugh.
"Check the glove compartment. I knew you were going to be disappointed, so I put something in there for you," Nick says.
I find $60 happy monies in there. Well, that's something...then temptation struck...
"Also, I'm giving you the choice of either going out to dinner or going home. It's up to you where we go."
Don't give in! You still have Comicon 2013! Don't let this derail....
Oh shut up! *punches will-power out* She should be out for a while.
"Let's go to Red Robin. I want a hamburger."
"Are you sure?" Nick asked.
"Yes! Go!"
I knew I didn't have much time before will-power would kick in and stop me. We got there. Ordered fried cheese sticks and fried zucchini with ranch to start and the Bleu Ribbon Cheeseburger and sweet potato fries for my meal...still not a peep from will-power.
Nick and I shared the appetizer. Mmmmm...It has been SO long since I've had fried food. I let it linger on my tongue. The wonderful mix of cheese, fried breading, and ranch dressing made my taste buds dance. Then came the burger. It was so nommilicious! Spicy and tangy and the sweet potato fries were so sweet and salty and...oh...what is that?
I got about three-quarters of the way done when I started to feel it...my tummy reacting to the abuse I just handed it. I quickly scarfed down the rest of my burger before
What's going on? Where am I? RED ROBIN?!?!? What are you doing?
I should have listened to you. I'm feeling the pang of guilt...and tummy-ache.
No one ever listens to Katie...
Oh...you're the side of me no one ever listens to. It's almost irresistible to ignore you. I'm sorry. It won't happen again.
That's what they all say. Listen to this, at least: It's OK to have a treat every once in a while, but not when it's a result of an emotional situation and not when you know you have no control over yourself. Emotional eating is not controlled eating. Eat a fry every once in a while. Have a bite of a burger. Heck! Have a burger, but not one laced with fatty meat, cheese and fried onion strings!
I don't even want to know how many calories I just consumed.
I don't either.
So I can't turn back time and change what happened last night, but I CAN learn from it and make sure it doesn't happen again. I still have Comicon 2013 as a goal to get to and I DID get $60 out of the deal, so it's not a total bust. Back on the horse again today. Going to work out even though I feel like crap and have no voice.
I'll tell you what, on that note. I have a special empathy now for those who are mute and have babies transitioning into toddlerhood. It is very difficult to communicate anything to her. Luckily, I've been teaching her the hand sign for "all done" at meals, so I at least have that, but I'm going to be chasing her all day. Mutes, I feel for you!
Let me just say that despite the horrible news I received, this was the BEST experience at the dentist I've ever had. The people at Monroe Family Dentistry are amazing, kind, and professional and had a way of presenting the difficult news that didn't turn me into a crying mess. haha.
Standing at the counter after my appointment with Nick and Bear, we heard all the work that needed to be done and the money it was going to cost us. I know all Nick was hearing was "ka ching ka ching ka ching..." "Just do it all," he says
"ALL of it?" I reply.
"Yes. Let's just get all the issues taken care of once and for all."
"Ok...Let's schedule it."
"This will mean no Comicon 2012 because of the cost, but it doesn't rule out Comicon 2013. If you hit the goal we set by the end of January, we'll go in 2013."
My heart sank to my stomach. No Comicon 2012!?! But...But...Doctor Who is celebrating its 50th year next year! I'm sure it's going to me more marvelous than EVER! Extreme disappointment settled in me.
I scheduled all the work to be done in February 2012 (yay...going to be in SO much pain that month). A root canal, 4 cavity fillings, and 3 wisdom tooth removals. Ugh.
"Check the glove compartment. I knew you were going to be disappointed, so I put something in there for you," Nick says.
I find $60 happy monies in there. Well, that's something...then temptation struck...
"Also, I'm giving you the choice of either going out to dinner or going home. It's up to you where we go."
Don't give in! You still have Comicon 2013! Don't let this derail....
Oh shut up! *punches will-power out* She should be out for a while.
"Let's go to Red Robin. I want a hamburger."
"Are you sure?" Nick asked.
"Yes! Go!"
I knew I didn't have much time before will-power would kick in and stop me. We got there. Ordered fried cheese sticks and fried zucchini with ranch to start and the Bleu Ribbon Cheeseburger and sweet potato fries for my meal...still not a peep from will-power.
Nick and I shared the appetizer. Mmmmm...It has been SO long since I've had fried food. I let it linger on my tongue. The wonderful mix of cheese, fried breading, and ranch dressing made my taste buds dance. Then came the burger. It was so nommilicious! Spicy and tangy and the sweet potato fries were so sweet and salty and...oh...what is that?
I got about three-quarters of the way done when I started to feel it...my tummy reacting to the abuse I just handed it. I quickly scarfed down the rest of my burger before
What's going on? Where am I? RED ROBIN?!?!? What are you doing?
I should have listened to you. I'm feeling the pang of guilt...and tummy-ache.
No one ever listens to Katie...
Oh...you're the side of me no one ever listens to. It's almost irresistible to ignore you. I'm sorry. It won't happen again.
That's what they all say. Listen to this, at least: It's OK to have a treat every once in a while, but not when it's a result of an emotional situation and not when you know you have no control over yourself. Emotional eating is not controlled eating. Eat a fry every once in a while. Have a bite of a burger. Heck! Have a burger, but not one laced with fatty meat, cheese and fried onion strings!
I don't even want to know how many calories I just consumed.
I don't either.
So I can't turn back time and change what happened last night, but I CAN learn from it and make sure it doesn't happen again. I still have Comicon 2013 as a goal to get to and I DID get $60 out of the deal, so it's not a total bust. Back on the horse again today. Going to work out even though I feel like crap and have no voice.
I'll tell you what, on that note. I have a special empathy now for those who are mute and have babies transitioning into toddlerhood. It is very difficult to communicate anything to her. Luckily, I've been teaching her the hand sign for "all done" at meals, so I at least have that, but I'm going to be chasing her all day. Mutes, I feel for you!
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Fat Doesn't Take a Sick Day
*open eyes*
"Ugh...I can't breathe still and my throat hurts...I feel worse than yesterday"
I've been sick since Monday this week and it's been manageable. My doc says it's a cold and it'll run it's course so that's great...yay for not having to pay for a prescription! However, it's made working out increasingly difficult. It's difficult to boogie when you have boogies running down the back of your throat and out your nose...sorry...TMI.
I did fine on Monday. Danced and stepped for an hour.
I did ok yesterday. Danced and stepped for a half hour.
Today, I crapped out for most of the day. I didn't want to do it. I tried stepping while watching The Biggest Loser that I recorded last night, but only lasted 15 minutes. I did the dishes and folded Bear's laundry and decided I wasn't going to try anymore. Ate some Cup Noodles and finished off the Costco Cheesecake in the fridge (880 calories...I regret that one). I rested and took a nap when Bear slept. Then when I woke up, that pesky inner voice started in on me...
Seriously? You're just going to lay around all day and eat junk food.
I didn't eat a lot of junk food.
880 calories is a lot!
OK...OK...I'll give you that. I just feel so awful.
Fat doesn't take a sick day.
What?
Fat doesn't take a sick day. Do you think your fatty fat body cares whether you're sick or not? Do you think that cheesecake is just going to poop out and your weight won't be effected at all just because you're sick? Get off your butt, change Bear's diaper, give her a snack, and get your booty shaking.
Ok...you're right.
So I pulled my butt out of bed, changed Bear, gave her a snack and did my Just Dance workout. I had to hydrate more often than normal during my workout, but I still completed it. I worked off enough calories to burn off one piece of cheesecake (440 calories) and I feel good about it...wasn't easy, though. I was ready to just turn in for the day. Lesson for the day: Fat doesn't take a sick day.
"Ugh...I can't breathe still and my throat hurts...I feel worse than yesterday"
I've been sick since Monday this week and it's been manageable. My doc says it's a cold and it'll run it's course so that's great...yay for not having to pay for a prescription! However, it's made working out increasingly difficult. It's difficult to boogie when you have boogies running down the back of your throat and out your nose...sorry...TMI.
I did fine on Monday. Danced and stepped for an hour.
I did ok yesterday. Danced and stepped for a half hour.
Today, I crapped out for most of the day. I didn't want to do it. I tried stepping while watching The Biggest Loser that I recorded last night, but only lasted 15 minutes. I did the dishes and folded Bear's laundry and decided I wasn't going to try anymore. Ate some Cup Noodles and finished off the Costco Cheesecake in the fridge (880 calories...I regret that one). I rested and took a nap when Bear slept. Then when I woke up, that pesky inner voice started in on me...
Seriously? You're just going to lay around all day and eat junk food.
I didn't eat a lot of junk food.
880 calories is a lot!
OK...OK...I'll give you that. I just feel so awful.
Fat doesn't take a sick day.
What?
Fat doesn't take a sick day. Do you think your fatty fat body cares whether you're sick or not? Do you think that cheesecake is just going to poop out and your weight won't be effected at all just because you're sick? Get off your butt, change Bear's diaper, give her a snack, and get your booty shaking.
Ok...you're right.
So I pulled my butt out of bed, changed Bear, gave her a snack and did my Just Dance workout. I had to hydrate more often than normal during my workout, but I still completed it. I worked off enough calories to burn off one piece of cheesecake (440 calories) and I feel good about it...wasn't easy, though. I was ready to just turn in for the day. Lesson for the day: Fat doesn't take a sick day.
Monday, November 14, 2011
Weigh-In 11/14/2011
Today is WI day and I lost 3.2 lbs last week.
That brings me to 5.8 lbs out of 34 for Comicon, leaving 28.2 left to go. I started out needing to lose a little over 3 lbs per week to get there and now it's just under 2.5 lbs per week.
I have lost 53.8 lbs on my WLJ so far to date.
Comicon here I come!
That brings me to 5.8 lbs out of 34 for Comicon, leaving 28.2 left to go. I started out needing to lose a little over 3 lbs per week to get there and now it's just under 2.5 lbs per week.
I have lost 53.8 lbs on my WLJ so far to date.
Comicon here I come!
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Good Going!
Here I am with this ludicrous goal ahead of me and it is HARD! I've managed to pull myself out of the 190's (unofficially...weigh-in is tomorrow). It's been surprisingly easy even with going out until today for some odd reason.
We went to Ivar's in Mukilteo, an amazing seafood restaurant. I'll just get something grilled...this will be no problem at all, I thought to myself. And I DID pick a great option, quite easily. A salad topped with smoked salmon, smoked scallops, and bay shrimp with mixed greens, avocado, tomato, hard-boiled egg, and bleu cheese. (No dressing ;) )
Then the bread came...wonderful, warm sourdough buns. It's ok...you're not big on bread anyway.
But then it got worse. The clam chowders came out for everyone else at the table. Clam chowder is one of my favorites, ESPECIALLY Ivar's clam chowder. Maybe just ONE bite won't hurt...
No! Don't do it! You are not capable of having just ONE bite and you know it!
OK...
Oh! How the wonderful smell of the chowder filled the air. The sounds of "mmmms" and "this chowder is SO good" surrounded me. Maybe just a cup...
The cup of chowder or Comicon?
Comicon... *grumble grumble grumble*
Finally! Lunch arrived! I can see my salad and it looks delicious, but...what's this new aroma? Fried fish...fried prawns...fried clams...fried onions...and...french fries...I am going to die...
No...you are going to Comicon.
*grumble grumble grumble*
"I think I need more tartar sauce." "I love the fried fish here." "Can I have some of your fries?" "Can I have your crouton?" "Are you going to finish that?" "Katie, are you ok?"
"Huh? Yeah...my salad is SO good!"
Fish and chips smell so good right now...
Comicon...Comicon...Comicon...Comicon
I know it's coming now, especially since there were plans for our friend to propose to his girlfriend in her dessert. "Would you all like some dessert menus?" "YES," rings across the table. Ugh.
It comes, he proposes, she says yes, and we're all happy and clapping. "YAY!" "Congratulations" "We're so happy for you" "This dessert trio is too big for the two of us...we're sharing with the table."
!!!!Seriously!!!! Holy canoles I can't win! I didn't order a dessert and now it's being offered to me.
"It's just one bite...come on..." "No thank you...I'm not capable of one bite...hahaha"
*weep*
Comicon...Comicon...Comicon...Comicon
The dessert slowly, but surely disappears without my assistance and I feel SO proud of myself for sticking to it today at lunch. If I can survive that, I can survive anything! And so can you!
We went to Ivar's in Mukilteo, an amazing seafood restaurant. I'll just get something grilled...this will be no problem at all, I thought to myself. And I DID pick a great option, quite easily. A salad topped with smoked salmon, smoked scallops, and bay shrimp with mixed greens, avocado, tomato, hard-boiled egg, and bleu cheese. (No dressing ;) )
Then the bread came...wonderful, warm sourdough buns. It's ok...you're not big on bread anyway.
But then it got worse. The clam chowders came out for everyone else at the table. Clam chowder is one of my favorites, ESPECIALLY Ivar's clam chowder. Maybe just ONE bite won't hurt...
No! Don't do it! You are not capable of having just ONE bite and you know it!
OK...
Oh! How the wonderful smell of the chowder filled the air. The sounds of "mmmms" and "this chowder is SO good" surrounded me. Maybe just a cup...
The cup of chowder or Comicon?
Comicon... *grumble grumble grumble*
Finally! Lunch arrived! I can see my salad and it looks delicious, but...what's this new aroma? Fried fish...fried prawns...fried clams...fried onions...and...french fries...I am going to die...
No...you are going to Comicon.
*grumble grumble grumble*
"I think I need more tartar sauce." "I love the fried fish here." "Can I have some of your fries?" "Can I have your crouton?" "Are you going to finish that?" "Katie, are you ok?"
"Huh? Yeah...my salad is SO good!"
Fish and chips smell so good right now...
Comicon...Comicon...Comicon...Comicon
I know it's coming now, especially since there were plans for our friend to propose to his girlfriend in her dessert. "Would you all like some dessert menus?" "YES," rings across the table. Ugh.
It comes, he proposes, she says yes, and we're all happy and clapping. "YAY!" "Congratulations" "We're so happy for you" "This dessert trio is too big for the two of us...we're sharing with the table."
!!!!Seriously!!!! Holy canoles I can't win! I didn't order a dessert and now it's being offered to me.
"It's just one bite...come on..." "No thank you...I'm not capable of one bite...hahaha"
*weep*
Comicon...Comicon...Comicon...Comicon
The dessert slowly, but surely disappears without my assistance and I feel SO proud of myself for sticking to it today at lunch. If I can survive that, I can survive anything! And so can you!
Saturday, November 5, 2011
Motivation Anyone?
In January, Nick, Bear, and I are heading to Wisconsin for a few weeks while he does some teaching for his work. The result will be a fairly major bonus. Yesterday, I asked him via text if we could go to Comicon with some of the money. "We will see" was his response.
Following a spectacular evening seeing Toy Story 3 on Ice with Julie (mother-in-law), Emily (sister-in-law), Champ (nephew), and Bear, Nick and I had a chat about it.
"What's your ultimate goal weight?" he asks.
"150," I reply.
"Wow...that's a lot. Here's the deal. You want motivation and you want to go to Comicon? Get down to 160 by the end of January and we'll go to Comicon. That way we're BOTH working toward it." he says.
"Great idea! And a blue dress so I can make a TARDIS costume" I excitedly respond.
"Okay," he chuckles.
Now, that's 34 lbs away from my weight on Monday, so it's a fairly loftly goal. But I REALLY want to go to Comicon...bad...This is probably the best motivation he could have come up with. If I hit goal and we go, I'm totally camping out to go into the Doctor Who panel!
Following a spectacular evening seeing Toy Story 3 on Ice with Julie (mother-in-law), Emily (sister-in-law), Champ (nephew), and Bear, Nick and I had a chat about it.
"What's your ultimate goal weight?" he asks.
"150," I reply.
"Wow...that's a lot. Here's the deal. You want motivation and you want to go to Comicon? Get down to 160 by the end of January and we'll go to Comicon. That way we're BOTH working toward it." he says.
"Great idea! And a blue dress so I can make a TARDIS costume" I excitedly respond.
"Okay," he chuckles.
Now, that's 34 lbs away from my weight on Monday, so it's a fairly loftly goal. But I REALLY want to go to Comicon...bad...This is probably the best motivation he could have come up with. If I hit goal and we go, I'm totally camping out to go into the Doctor Who panel!
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